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A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

Proverbs 14:1 ‘A wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.’

I believe no woman in her right mind intentionally tears down her home. Those who do so act in lack of understanding, sheer ignorance, and foolishness. Wisdom is everything in life. It spares us a lot of heartache and needless loss of the things we hold dear.

Wisdom is more precious than anything of great value. Nothing you desire can compare with her. She offers you long life in the right hand, and riches and honour in the left. Her paths are delightful, and her ways satisfying. Wisdom is a tree of life to those who embrace her; happy are those who hold her tightly.

Wisdom comes from God. The word of God equips us for every good work, which includes building our homes. God gives us wisdom so we can live lives that please Him. In the absence of wisdom, we can deal with life recklessly, let our emotions toss us to and fro.

Wisdom is not just an accumulation of the right information; it is also the ability to apply it in one’s life. Hence the need to get understanding. Understanding cements your commitment to make wise choices and stick with doing the right thing even when you don’t feel like it.

Wisdom builds her house and has it firmly set on a foundation of seven strong pillars. When you embrace wisdom, it will lead you to riches, honour, enduring wealth and prosperity, (Proverbs 8 and 9). Wisdom serves rare delicacies. Her meals leave you full and satisfied – intoxicated with joy and peace.

Whether it be a man or material possessions, you will need wisdom to get them and keep them. A wise woman understands the need for acquiring and walking in wisdom.

A wise woman builds her home by:

  • Submitting to her husband.

This is not a choice, but a command to obey. It is not something she does only if her husband deserves it. She recognizes that wives are commanded to submit to their husbands in spite of their attitude or behaviour.

Ephesians 5:22; Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

  • Being blameless and pure.

She is committed to living a blameless and pure life, endeavoring to be at peace with everyone. Her actions are consistent with the faith she professes, engaging only in what is pleasing to her Lord.

Philippians 2:14-15; Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crocked generation. Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky. 

  • Maintaining wholesome speech.

She doesn’t open her mouth to speak just anyhow. When she speaks, her words are seasoned with grace. Her language is clean and edifying. She opens her mouth with wisdom and the law of kindness is on her tongue. From her servants to people she works with, to her own husband and children, she treats everyone with kindness, humility, and respect.

Ephesians 4:29; Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up, according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

  • Being reverent in the way she lives.

She doesn’t live a careless life. Her ways are honourable and respectable before God and man. She conducts herself in a fashion that is beyond reproach and her behavior does not violate God’s Word. She dedicates herself to develop others to good works.

Titus 2:3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.

  • Loving her husband and children.

She does not withhold good; her time and attention, and whatever is good from her husband and children. She doesn’t delegate or neglect the core aspects of loving her family. She greatly enriches their lives.

Titus 2:4; Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children.

  • Interceding for them.

She prays for her husband and children. She commits them to the Lord, careful not to leave anything that concerns them to chance.

1 Samuel 25:18-35 Abigail acted quickly. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys…..

  • Allowing her husband to be the head.

She does not compete for leadership with her husband. She allows her husband to be the head, while being a great support to him to help him fulfill his vision.

Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church, his body.

  • Teaching and training her children.

She teaches and trains her children in the way that they should go, thereby ensuring that they do not go astray and lose out in life. She disciplines them, thus driving foolishness far from her children, and preparing them to succeed in life.

Proverbs 22:6; Start off children the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

  • Being tender-hearted.

She listens to her children, reassures and encourages them. She showers them with love and affection, both physically and verbally. This woman openly and extravagantly expresses love to her children. She approves, accepts and affirms them, hence building their self-worth and confidence.

Isaiah 49:15 Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you.

  • Being a crown to her husband.

She represents her husband well; he is well spoken of and esteemed. She does not disrespect or dishonor her husband.

Proverbs 12:4 A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

  • Paying attention to her appearance

She does not take her husband for granted. She pays close attention to her appearance, both during the day and at night. She enjoys looking her best and makes an effort to stay attractive to her husband.

Proverbs 24:3 By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established.

  • Being a home maker.

She takes charge of her household. She carefully watches over everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness. She organizes her home and cultivates good taste in her household, turning her house into a home.

Proverbs 24:4 Through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.

Realize that sense is not common. Educate yourself in order to have good sense in managing practical matters. Learn the value of discretion. Good judgment and sensitivity to others are rare, but highly esteemed traits.

Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding Proverbs 4:7.

Lillian Chebosi

 

Woman of Virtue

I am a huge fun of the woman many would love to hate. She is a great role model for me, and I am a work in progress for most of her qualities. As I strive to equip myself and others to be better, I would like to help us move closer to embracing this woman of virtue by considering some of her qualities.

Virtue is something we all want to be full of. We want to be graceful and gracious, and do everything with excellence. A virtuous and capable wife is more precious than rubies. (Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies).

Here is a woman who does it all and has mastered the art of balancing her life. She is a woman who can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, make her man feel like a man, raise successful children, keep her household running smoothly, be a thriving entrepreneur, and still have time to reach out to others. Wow!

  • She fears the Lord

Above all else, she fears the Lord. It is evident in her character and her speech. Her behaviour does not violate God’s Word. (Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised).

For fear of the Lord, she conducts herself in a fashion that is beyond reproach. She strives to be a woman approved by God.

She opens her mouth with wisdom and the law of kindness is on her tongue. From her servants to people she works with, to her own husband and children, she treats everyone with kindness, humility, and respect. (Proverbs 31:26 She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue).


She doesn’t just open her mouth to speak anyhow. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness. Her language is clean and edifying.

  • She builds herself up

She doesn’t wait for anyone to encourage her. She knows how to strengthen herself spiritually, intellectually, physically, socially, and emotionally. (Proverbs 31:17 She girds herself with strength, and strengthens her arms).

She recognizes that how she lives out her days is how she’s living her life. She develops daily habits that will build her up in all areas of life. (Proverbs 31:25 Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come).


What are you doing daily to build yourself? We don’t choose our destiny but we choose our habits. And our habits determine our destiny. Habits make good virtues almost instinctive, for we are made in such a way that whatever we repeat periodically becomes second nature to us.

She dresses up elegantly – in fine linen and royal gowns. (Proverbs 31:22 She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple).

This woman doesn’t dress just to cover nakedness. She pays close attention to her appearance, both during the day and at night. She enjoys looking her best and makes an effort to stay attractive to her husband. Her style is classic, simple and contemporary, while always exhibiting a high-level look.

  • She is an Excellent Wife

She is an exceptional wife. She has won the heart of her husband. (Proverbs 31:11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain).

She greatly enriches her husband’s life. She does not withhold good from him and brings him no harm, all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:12 She does him good and not evil, all the days of her life).

This woman does not delegate or neglect the core aspects of loving her husband. She plans and prioritizes her time to be efficient and effective, and applies her will to do the important things in her life.

She represents her husband well, she doesn't bad mouth him; he is well spoken of and esteemed. She does not disrespect or dishonor her husband. (Proverbs 31:23 Her husband is known in the gates, where he sits among the elders of the land).

She is a great support to him, and she does not compete for leadership with him. She stands by him and rallies behind him to help him fulfill his vision.

  • She is an Excellent Mother

She is an exceptional mother. She does not delegate o neglect the core aspects of loving her children. This woman does not withhold her time and attention, and whatever is good from her children.

She prays with them and over them.

She listens to them, and reassures and encourages them.

She teaches and trains them in the way that they should go, thereby ensuring that they do not go astray and lose out in life.

She showers them with love and affection, both physically and verbally. This woman openly and extravagantly expresses love to her children.

She approves, accepts and affirms them, hence building their self-worth and confidence.
She disciplines them, driving foolishness far from her children; and thus preparing them to succeed in life.

She makes disciples of them. This woman is a great role model for her children.

Her children adore her. They rise up and bless her. (Proverbs31:28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her).

  • She is an excellent home maker and runs her household well

She takes charge of her household. She carefully watches over everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness. (Proverbs 31:27 She watches over the affairs of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness).

She has foresight, prepares well and is not lazy. She is clothed with strength and dignity, and is well prepared for all seasons of life. She is not fearful of the future. (Proverbs 31:21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet).

She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls. (Proverbs 31:15 She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household, and portions for her maidservants).

Even though she has helpers, she watches over what is going on in her house. She is in the know and in control.

She does not view domesticity as something that is beneath her, but rather something to be mastered and personalized to her specific design. To her, housework is an honourable privilege, an avenue of creative expression as well as a revelation of her spirit to her family and guests.

Her house is comfortable and inviting. Despite being under tremendous pressure to be productive in the market place, she takes the time to make her home a safe haven for herself and her family to retreat to for refreshment and nourishment.

She makes her home beautiful. She has an eye for the finer things and cultivates good taste in her household, turning her house into a home.

She does not neglect or delegate the core aspects of cooking and planning meals for her household. She realizes that food represents more than just a regular meal. It represents her love, security, care, and even comfort to the ones she serves. She appreciates that cooking is part of the art of homemaking and develops this area of her life.

  • She is diligent and savvy in her market place assignment

She makes money. She is entrepreneurial, industrial and resourceful. (Proverbs 13:14 She is like the merchant ships, she brings her food from afar).

She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. (Proverbs 31:13 She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands).

She is diligent, rising up early and going to bed late. She has mastered her skill so well that her clients are willing to pay whatever she asks for her goods. (Proverbs 31:18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night).

She throws herself into work with passion and chooses to revel in productivity. (Proverbs 31:19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle).

She pursues work in the area of her gifting. She has turned her passion into profit. (Proverbs 31:24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants).

She carefully chooses from among her natural gifts and develops them into a productive craft with which she blesses others and brings her personal joy and satisfaction.

She is good at noticing and making use of good deals and bargains. (Proverbs 31:16 She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard).

She engages in profitable business, working hard for her success. She contributes to the family wealth.

This woman is on top of her money. She is a good investor and manages her finances well.

 

  • She is loving and compassionate towards others

She is not self absorbed. She reaches out to those less fortunate than herself. (Proverbs 31:20 She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy).

Even after her husband, children and servants are well taken care of, she extends herself to help the poor and needy in her community.

Lillian Chebosi

 
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A Woman is a Nurturer

Every real woman knows that although she is successful, she is first a child of God, second a woman, and third someone who needs to give something of herself to others in order to be all she was made to be. In order to live a balanced life between career and a personal life, a woman must remain true to who she is, who she was designed to be - a life giver, a nurturer. This is where deep satisfaction will always be found because every woman’s spirit craves to express itself in accordance with God’s design.

Lillian Chebosi

 

 
 

You are a product of the rock from which you were hewn


“Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation”. (C. Everett Koop)