Equipping young women professionals with young families to find fulfillment, contentment and joy as mothers and home makers without losing sight of who they are as women.

Woman of Virtue

I am a huge fun of the woman many would love to hate. She is a great role model for me, and I am a work in progress for most of her qualities. As I strive to equip myself and others to be better, I would like to help us move closer to embracing this woman of virtue by considering some of her qualities.

Virtue is something we all want to be full of. We want to be graceful and gracious, and do everything with excellence. A virtuous and capable wife is more precious than rubies. (Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies).

Here is a woman who does it all and has mastered the art of balancing her life. She is a woman who can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, make her man feel like a man, raise successful children, keep her household running smoothly, be a thriving entrepreneur, and still have time to reach out to others. Wow!

• She fears the Lord

Above all else, she fears the Lord. It is evident in her character and her speech. Her behaviour does not violate God’s Word. (Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised).

For fear of the Lord, she conducts herself in a fashion that is beyond reproach. She strives to be a woman approved by God.

She opens her mouth with wisdom and the law of kindness is on her tongue. From her servants to people she works with, to her own husband and children, she treats everyone with kindness, humility, and respect. (Proverbs 31:26 She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue).

She doesn’t just open her mouth to speak anyhow. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness. Her language is clean and edifying.

• She builds herself up

She doesn’t wait for anyone to encourage her. She knows how to strengthen herself spiritually, intellectually, physically, socially, and emotionally. (Proverbs 31:17 She girds herself with strength, and strengthens her arms).

She recognizes that how she lives out her days is how she’s living her life. She develops daily habits that will build her up in all areas of life. (Proverbs 31:25 Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come).

What are you doing daily to build yourself? We don’t choose our destiny but we choose our habits. And our habits determine our destiny. Habits make good virtues almost instinctive, for we are made in such a way that whatever we repeat periodically becomes second nature to us.

She dresses up elegantly – in fine linen and royal gowns. (Proverbs 31:22 She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple).

This woman doesn’t dress just to cover nakedness. She pays close attention to her appearance, both during the day and at night. She enjoys looking her best and makes an effort to stay attractive to her husband. Her style is classic, simple and contemporary, while always exhibiting a high-level look.

• She is an Excellent Wife

She is an exceptional wife. She has won the heart of her husband. (Proverbs 31:11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain).

She greatly enriches her husband’s life. She does not withhold good from him and brings him no harm, all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:12 She does him good and not evil, all the days of her life).

This woman does not delegate or neglect the core aspects of loving her husband. She plans and prioritizes her time to be efficient and effective, and applies her will to do the important things in her life.

She represents her husband well, she doesn't bad mouth him; he is well spoken of and esteemed. She does not disrespect or dishonor her husband. (Proverbs 31:23 Her husband is known in the gates, where he sits among the elders of the land).

She is a great support to him, and she does not compete for leadership with him. She stands by him and rallies behind him to help him fulfill his vision.

• She is an Excellent Mother

She is an exceptional mother. She does not delegate o neglect the core aspects of loving her children. This woman does not withhold her time and attention, and whatever is good from her children.

She prays with them and over them.

She listens to them, and reassures and encourages them.

She teaches and trains them in the way that they should go, thereby ensuring that they do not go astray and lose out in life.

She showers them with love and affection, both physically and verbally. This woman openly and extravagantly expresses love to her children.

She approves, accepts and affirms them, hence building their self-worth and confidence.
She disciplines them, driving foolishness far from her children; and thus preparing them to succeed in life.

She makes disciples of them. This woman is a great role model for her children.

Her children adore her. They rise up and bless her. (Proverbs31:28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her).

• She is an excellent home maker and runs her household well

She takes charge of her household. She carefully watches over everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness. (Proverbs 31:27 She watches over the affairs of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness).

She has foresight, prepares well and is not lazy. She is clothed with strength and dignity, and is well prepared for all seasons of life. She is not fearful of the future. (Proverbs 31:21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet).

She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls. (Proverbs 31:15 She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household, and portions for her maidservants).

Even though she has helpers, she watches over what is going on in her house. She is in the know and in control.

She does not view domesticity as something that is beneath her, but rather something to be mastered and personalized to her specific design. To her, housework is an honourable privilege, an avenue of creative expression as well as a revelation of her spirit to her family and guests.

Her house is comfortable and inviting. Despite being under tremendous pressure to be productive in the market place, she takes the time to make her home a safe haven for herself and her family to retreat to for refreshment and nourishment.

She makes her home beautiful. She has an eye for the finer things and cultivates good taste in her household, turning her house into a home.

She does not neglect or delegate the core aspects of cooking and planning meals for her household. She realizes that food represents more than just a regular meal. It represents her love, security, care, and even comfort to the ones she serves. She appreciates that cooking is part of the art of homemaking and develops this area of her life.

• She is diligent and savvy in her market place assignment

She makes money. She is entrepreneurial, industrial and resourceful. (Proverbs 13:14 She is like the merchant ships, she brings her food from afar).

She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. (Proverbs 31:13 She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands).

She is diligent, rising up early and going to bed late. She has mastered her skill so well that her clients are willing to pay whatever she asks for her goods. (Proverbs 31:18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night).

She throws herself into work with passion and chooses to revel in productivity. (Proverbs 31:19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle).

She pursues work in the area of her gifting. She has turned her passion into profit. (Proverbs 31:24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants).

She carefully chooses from among her natural gifts and develops them into a productive craft with which she blesses others and brings her personal joy and satisfaction.

She is good at noticing and making use of good deals and bargains. (Proverbs 31:16 She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard).

She engages in profitable business, working hard for her success. She contributes to the family wealth.

This woman is on top of her money. She is a good investor and manages her finances well.

• She is loving and compassionate towards others
  

She is not self absorbed. She reaches out to those less fortunate than herself. (Proverbs 31:20 She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy).

Even after her husband, children and servants are well taken care of, she extends herself to help the poor and needy in her community.

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 02, Issue 22: Learning Self-Discipline

Anything worth attaining takes hard work and discipline. Success is not cheap; it comes with a price. One of the prices to pay for success is self-discipline. It is what makes it easier for one to make the sacrifices that are required to achieve his or her goals.

We know what we need to do to get to where we want to be. But in the absence of self-discipline, we lack the stamina to rise up and do them. We take ourselves in circles with one excuse after another and wallow is mediocrity.

A life lived with self-discipline for pre-determined results is not an easy one, but there’s none like it. Life avails us two options, to regret or to rejoice. And we get to do both. Our level of discipline determines which we live with.

Self-discipline lets us do what needs to be done irrespective of the mood. It is the ability to do what we know we should do, whether we feel like it or not. This means being able to do things that may be hard but necessary, while overcoming the natural urge to lazy around.

Self-discipline is the constant in the success equation that we cannot do without. People who make it in life, whether becoming wealthy, running successful business empires or being esteemed and respected by others have mastered the art of self-discipline. They focus their minds and energy on things that contribute to the attainment of their objectives.

Self-discipline is a personal responsibility, an act of the will. It is about conquering oneself. Self-discipline is one of the most important success skills we will ever learn. If we master it, we will become increasingly productive and able to accomplish much more in life.

Self-discipline is the key to harnessing the full potential of our gifts. It is what makes us do all that we need to do to develop our gifts. It affords us an unwavering focus in advancing our gifts, elevating us to stand a shoulder above the masses.

What do you want to be outstanding at? Develop the necessary disciplines around it. Create a routine and stick to it, and be sure to reward yourself when you do well.


Lillian Chebosi

Volume 02, Issue 21: Teaching Profits The Teacher
 
As I sit under great minds through books, conferences and other learning avenues, I am disciplining myself to take note of what I want to apply, what I want to change and what I want to teach. I figured there’s no point of interacting with life transforming information only to remain the same. It’s a waste of time.
 
The things I am learning inspire me so much, I can’t keep them to myself. A teacher yearns to share her knowledge. But I am not satisfied with just knowledge. I want change. Whenever we pick a material to read, our main objective should be nothing short of learning something to change our lives. Knowledge does not change us. It only does when we apply it.
 
Passing on our learning to others clarifies our learning and commits us to change. When you pursue knowledge with the objective of teaching others, you work harder than when you learn just to benefit yourself. In the process, you get more out of your learning.
 
We learn better when we teach. When we learn with the intent of self-change and passing our learning to others, our concentration is enhanced and the propensity to apply our learning intensified.
 
Although it is done to benefit others, teaching profits the teacher. It clarifies your learning and commits you to change more than anything else. Teaching continually lifts the teacher to a higher level.
 
Since it is hypocritical to teach what we are not applying in our lives, teaching keeps us accountable. Teaching what we know commits us to live out what we have learnt. The burden of being a credible example of the principles we promote accentuates as we teach.
 
Live with the awareness that you are here to add value to people. As you interact with people, let your attitude be to teach them something you know in order to help them come up higher.
 
Use your gifts and experience not just to accomplish your goals, but to help release a dream in someone else. Find something you are knowledgeable and passionate about and teach it to someone.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Lillian Chebosi

Volume 02, Issue 20: A Credible Example

The best gift we can give ourselves is to be who we pretend to be. It is hypocritical to teach what we are not applying in our lives. As we share our learning with others, we should be careful to live out what we teach.

Leaders bear the greatest burden for accountability. Yet most of the time, the actions and behavior of some leaders contradict their words. When you offer those you lead a credible example, you won’t have to say much. You will have a faithful following because of your example.

As teachers, people are yearning for our example more than they want our lessons. A compelling example does more than any lesson. Model what you teach. Provide a compelling example to your apprentice.

Some of us judge others too harshly. When the dramas of public personalities come to the open, we are quick to condemn them for all manner of things. But, if the limelight were to be turned on us, we probably wouldn’t look any better. Judge others by the standard you use to judge yourself. Don’t excuse yourself of what you accuse others.

Are you subjecting yourself to the same standard you expect of your protégés? Don’t be hard on others while being easy on yourself. Expect more from yourself than you expect of others. Model your expectation. We shouldn’t require qualities in others that we do not possess. Nothing is stronger in influencing people than a good example.

I speak to audiences regularly. I would be dishonest to say that I live by everything I teach to the letter. Sometimes I am work in progress of the lessons I teach. However, I strive to reach the ideal of the lessons I teach, and I am not there yet. I realize that more than any lesson, my example counts for everything.

It’s not about perfection, but the consistency of your actions. Strive to be a credible example. The key to becoming a person worth emulating is to transform into one committed to living his or her learning. The best gift you can give to people looking up to you to be a good example.

Lillian Chebosi

Volume 02, Issue 19: Time is Enough

What is your relationship with time? Is it a blissful one or a miserable one? Do you often feel like you don’t have enough time to do the things that are important to you? The only time we have is the time we make use of.

We bear the sole responsibility for the employment of our time. We have to choose to either organize our time or agonize over losing it because once lost, it cannot be recovered.

A number of things compete for our time in any given day, leaving us with very limited personal time. Hence the urgency to plan and prioritize our time to make optimal use of it.

How much is your hour worth? Assign a value to your personal time. Sieve out tasks and activities that are of less value. See if there are tasks that you engage in that you find that as you do them, activities that would better add value to your life are neglected.

I concluded that some tasks and activities are not an optimal use of my time. They may be good, but they are not important to me. Being a morning person, early morning is a prime time for me; running errands for instance, isn’t an optimal way to invest it. So, I relegate such tasks to my least productive time, or delegate them. What is your prime time? Choose to spend your most productive time on activities that develop you.

Important tasks are tasks in line with our objectives. What are the important things in your life that you must determine to do first? Planning our time is mandatory if we are to get what is important done. We must find a practical balance in the employment of our time.

The abundance of activities does not imply effective use of time. Just because you are all over the place doesn’t mean you are productive where it matters. If you find yourself preoccupied with several activities, stop and reflect on the value you derive from them. If they don’t serve to develop you, find ways to limit them to a bare minimum.

One of the reasons we don’t achieve our goals is because we spend our time doing things that do not contribute to their attainment. Look out for what you can rightfully and effectively delegate to free up your time for important engagements. In addition, identify your time stealers and deal with them. Strengthen your boundaries. Also, other people’s activities must not distract you from your purpose.

Although time is never too much, it is never too little. But it is enough. Our aim should be to get to the point where we can confidently say that we have more than enough time to do the things that are important to us.

Time is what life is made of. If you love life do not squander time. Anthony Gitonga

Lillian Chebosi